Little Weddings

My husband-to-be and I are both private people. We have friends, just not a lot of them. We have small families and there are the usual conflicts. As a result, we are choosing to have a very small wedding party--less than 10 people. It has made it quite difficult to plan for and organize our wedding. Many of the venues we initially fell in love with didn't offer services for such a small wedding. Financially, a lot of things just didn't make sense when investing for a small wedding.

Fortunately, we realized that such a small wedding is often referred to as an elopement. In my mind, it still means flying off to Las Vegas without anyone knowing, but for many venues an elopement simply means a very small, private wedding. The up side is that this seems to take a tiny bit less planning.

For anyone else planning a very small wedding, here are some tips and suggestions:

* Search for sites using the term "Elopements" or "Elopement Packages". When we originally looked up "Wedding Venues" we were often dissappointed to find out after emailing and calling that our party was too small.

* Think about renting a house! Yes. Use someone else's fancy private estate to host your wedding, house your guests, and make it much more cozy without losing any of the potential elegance. This was suggested to me by a fabulous wedding planner who runs a high end operation and took time out to call me after I'd sent an email. We almost went this route, but did find a restaurant in a town we liked.
To rent a house, look up http://www.vrbo.com/ (It stands for Vacation Rentals By Owner) We found several gorgeous estates in places like the San Francisco Bay Area that would house 10 guests in a gorgeous home for 3-days for $1500. Add a caterer for around $500, decorate yourself by arriving a day early and viola, you are well on your way to saving a bundle.

* Make it personal- the nice thing about a very small wedding is being able to spend time with everyone there. I am making little gift baggie/box party favors that will have something unique for each person to have as a way to commemorate the occassion while I say a bit of thanks.

* Don't skimp on pictures, attire, and meal- look as beautiful as you imagine yourself looking. I decided that I get to wear a wedding gown once and I'm wearing it for the love of my life and myself. So, I went with the dress I dreamt of even though it was a few hundred dollars more than other very suitable options.  There are a lot of very crummy photographers that come with package deals. Negotiate for a different photographer, but do not compromise on quality. These are the images that will grace your home. We all hope to remember intimate details for eternity, but the fact is, pictures stay with us. Make sure they are truly special. Since the celebration of the event with family is the part you treasure about them being there, make sure its food you will all enjoy. Everyone remembers a bad meal. It mars the situation. Make it a great meal so that it does not detract one bit from the joy and rememberance of your wedding.

Most importantly, have fun planning your wedding. When it is small, you can pay attention to finer details, add your personal touch and make it a more meaningful time.